When you reach middle age, please put away your generosity.
There is a principle in doing things, a bottom line for people, and a degree of concession.
philosophy Life Network
Wang Xiaobo wrote in the Golden Age:
"in one's life, there are very few things you can choose by yourself.
We can't choose how to live or die, but we can choose how to love and how to live. "
those who choose generously must be people who are kind-hearted and reasonable, people who value friendship more than interests, people who are warm and full of sense of justice, and people who know how to make concessions and cherish them.
generosity is a kind of virtue, a kind of goodwill, and a kind of open-mindedness that is not willing to care too much.
but nothing goes too far.
there is absolutely no problem with being generous, but you must not be too generous. Being too generous will imply a lot of trouble.
there is no real empathy in this world, and your own generosity and kindness may not be a big deal in the eyes of others.
Don't be too generous, be principled
A generous person is characterized by being informal, generous and helpful.
however, generosity should be based on principles.
have seen a real example:
Xiao Wu opened a small clothing factory in partnership with his friends.
catching up with the trend of e-commerce, the business of this small factory is getting better day by day.
slowly, a small workshop has become a big factory, with hundreds of employees. Xiao Wu returned to his hometown and became a guest of honor.
distant relatives hope that Xiao Wu can bring up her children.
Xiao Wu thought that anyway, the factory always needed to hire people and pat on the chest to finalize the matter.
before long, more untouchable relatives sneaked in from their hometown.
Business is better and there is a shortage of manpower, so Xiao Wu does not refuse anyone who comes, so he arranges them to enter the factory.
it's just that these people banded together to crowd out the others.
, there was an epidemic.
clothes piled up, Xiao Wu held on for more than half a year, and the capital chain was broken.
Xiao Wu was so anxious that he had to give his employees a sum of money and let them go back to their hometown.
the worst scolds are those who are related to their relatives, saying that he is a profiteering businessman, pretending to be generous, saying that he is for their safety, and that he is not driving people away in disguise, only for profit, and does not say anything about human feelings.
Xiao Wu completely ruined his reputation in his hometown.
Xiao Wu's biggest mistake is that he is too generous, cronyism and loses his principles.
such an outcome is predictable, and many people can share blessings, but they will never share difficulties.
because human nature is so narrow that when self-interest is not involved, it is easy to say that when it comes to self-interest, it is easy to turn over others and forget all the good things of others.
Don't be too generous, just give
in life, not all hard work can be rewarded.
not all hard work leads to good results;
not all people are grateful to you.
you are not omnipotent. No matter how kind and generous you are, you can't answer everything you want.
when the manpower is exhausted, it is inevitable that everyone will not be satisfied.
the writer Liu Tong has a thought-provoking sentence:
"in this world, those who have results are called pay, and those who have no results are called price."
that's true. Many people are realistic and pay more attention to results than to your efforts.
Keigo Higano tells a profound story in "malice":
in primary school, there was a new student in the class, named Noguchi, who was introverted and not good at words.
Rigao is a friendly, soft-hearted person, more compassionate and compassionate for the weak.
he communicated generously with Noguchi and took the initiative to send Noguchi to and from school.
as a result, the two became close friends.
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in middle school, someone bullied Noguchi, and Rigao risked protecting him.
although the response was mediocre, Noguchi was finally on his own.
is it just that Rigao has paid so much unselfishly, is the wild taste exciting?
Noguchi is not grateful. On the contrary, he is very jealous. Noguchi thinks he is much better than Rigao. Why does Noguchi's achievements make him look up to him?
later, the layout of Noguchi killed Rigao and ruined Rigao's reputation.
Rigao is so kind and generous that he is unreservedly kind to his friends, but finally bites the hand that feeds him.
to know that enough is enough, there is always a heart that is not hot.
giving is not an obligation. If you don't know how to cherish, you don't deserve to have it.
people's hearts may not be exchanged for hearts, but they may be exchanged for wolf ambition.
being too generous and always giving without asking for anything in return is actually a disease that can be cured.
the greatest evil of human nature is that it is not good for others.
it is never wrong to be kind, but to give it to the wrong person.
Don't be too generous, be patient
have seen a test program:
there are two men in the picture, the big man is a test actor, next to a gentle young man who eats with his girlfriend, and he is very bookish.
they eat at the same table.
this restaurant is a buffet, take as much as you eat, and finally check out.
the big man eats and drinks as if there is no one around, talking with his friends from time to time and spitting.
the male girlfriend of the scholar quietly moved a little further away, and the male scholar frowned and said nothing.
after eating a dessert, the scholar put the empty plate on the left-hand side, when the big man threw two plates directly, and he crossed the line.
bookThe born man looked unhappy and laid the plate silently.
the big man continued to throw, and the scholar man stole a few glances, but still said nothing.
plates soon piled up.
there was a conflict when checking out. The big man only paid for a few plates in front of him, while the scholar man only paid for himself and his girlfriend.
more than half of the plate is left unattended.
the scholar man was submissive, and his girlfriend argued hard and did not give in, and the two sides almost got into a fight.
afterwards, they knew it was a test program. The scholar boy looked depressed. The big man smiled apologetically and said, "your girlfriend is good. Cherish it."
the scholar boy was ashamed.
our ancestors told us, "A little impatience leads to a big plan."
A person is always small-bellied, haggling, and naturally annoying.
but it is not necessarily a good thing for a person to be tolerant until there is no bottom line, if he is always ignoring the details and is too generous.
excessive forbearance is actually a loser. Will only let the other side unscrupulous, take an inch.
unwittingly helps the bad guys to be arrogant.
the rabbit bites when it is in a hurry, not to mention a person.
trifles can be seen not only in character but also in the hearts of the people.
you can endure humiliation, but don't swallow it, you can be generous and patient, but don't retreat again and again.
Tu Lei said:
"forgive those who hurt themselves, once is kind, twice tolerant, the third time is cheap!"
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Zhu Xi once said:
"those who spoil are unknown, but those who are greedy are insatiable."
to give, you have to meet someone who knows how to be grateful; be generous, and you have to give it to someone who deserves it.
when people are alive, being "stingy" in an appropriate and timely manner is not necessarily a bad thing.
there are principles in doing things, a bottom line for people, and a degree of concession.
Life leaves all kindness, patience, tolerance and concession to those closest to you and cherish those who walk with you.
finally, may you be generous and know what you can do; if you can, make progress and act according to your ability.