Friends who are willing to accompany us for the rest of our lives.
zxrsnet Zhihu once asked, "Why is it that the older you are, the less you want to make friends?" One of them replied: "because the older you are, the more you can tell what is a true friend and what is a false friendship." I have a lot of experience. When I was young, I thought that all over the world were brothers, and everyone was sincere. The more people you have met and the more things you have experienced, you will understand that there are true and false friends. Better understand that sentence: time knows people, but it is difficult to know people. True friends are "useless" About what is a true friend, what is still fresh in my memory is the theory of "friend uselessness" put forward by Chen Guo, a teacher at Fudan University. In her opinion, true friends are "useless". "the spirit of Fudan is: a free and useless soul, and this uselessness is useless utilitarianism." "it's the same with making friends. We don't make friends because they are useful or because we want to take advantage of each other." I totally agree. Any relationship based on utilitarian purposes will not stand the test and will not last long. Just like Fan Zhongyan in the Northern Song Dynasty, when his official career was prosperous, he was full of people. He was later demoted to Yingzhou. When he left Beijing, the official friends who usually made friends with him, for fear of being implicated, avoided it one after another. Only an official named Wang Qian, even though he was ill in bed, insisted on getting up and sent Fan Zhongyan out of the city. It coincides with the classic saying of the ancients: "benefit intersects, benefit does its best, then scatters; potential intersects, potential goes away; power intersects, power loses, and power is abandoned; righteousness intersects with each other forever." The friendship that begins with "useless" can withstand the big waves to clean up the sand, the green hills do not change, and the green water flows forever. What is a true friend like? It probably is: I am full of friends, you do not cling to; I am successful, you are not jealous; I have nothing, you do not despise; I am down and out, you do not give up. Each other is not intertwined with interests, simple and pure; just because they are congenial by nature, they really know each other. True friends. Guard the loneliness in each other's lives The writer Lu Sihao once said: "how far is the distance between people? Your world is thunder and lightning, but he can't hear a sound. But there is no need to be too sad, because we will eventually encounter understanding, maybe not much, but the victory lies in depth. " That's true. There is always someone in the world, when you meet, you will understand the sentence "this firewood door is only opened for you today". In the movie "the True World", Durst was unfortunately infected with AIDS during a blood transfusion and was isolated by the town residents together with his mother. Until one day, he met the loner Ari and talked to him through the fence. Perhaps because of the same age and growing up in a single-parent family, two lonely children soon become one. Instead of avoiding AIDS like the secular fear of AIDS, Ari is determined to help Durst cure the disease. He made soup over and over again to do medicine experiments, and even ran away from home with Durst, looking for a famous doctor. Along the way, the two spent an unforgettable summer trip. Although he did not keep Durst's life in the end, he accompanied Durst through the best time of his life. Someone once said, " We spend our whole lives looking for a common soul in the vast sea of people to fill the loneliness of life. " This is also the highest state of friends: at both ends of the world, guarding each other's isolated islands. When you don't mean it, Ta can always see the joys and sorrows in your heart; when you want to stop, Ta can always understand your silence. Ta may not say too many nice things, but he can always stay with you silently when you need it. Not for taking, not for return. As teacher Chen Guo said: The reason why people make friends is for dedication and love, why are they willing to love? Because this person makes you feel a sense of tacit understanding that you have never had before. Ta is not your relative and is not related by blood, but you and Ta collide with each other in spirit. Because of the existence of Ta, you are no longer lonely, no longer lonely in this world. What are true friends like? Probably as a film review of "the World of True feelings" said: Because I met you, I did not spend this short life in darkness and cold, and because I met you, I was not afraid of this lonely journey of a billion light-years. A true friend is grateful. I remember someone once said that the most gripping thing in a friendship is: You have 10 yuan, give him 9 yuan, but not as good as others have 100 yuan, give him 50 yuan. The most chilling thing is: you have helped him 10 times, only once can not help, he turned against you. That's true. Most of the time, friends often take each other's efforts for granted and forget each other's goodness because of their closeness to each other. Finally, it is a pity that it ends. I remember a sentence written by the author Zhang Cenxi: "the other party does not expect your return, that is the other party's great virtue, but if you do not return it, you will bite the hand that feeds you. That is your immorality." The same is true between friends. Don't let the weakness of human nature chill the other person's heart. I remember the story of two friends in the desert I once read: When he was slapped in the face by his friend, he chose to write in the sand; when he fell into the fertile field and his life was worried and was rescued by his friend, he chose to carve it in stone. He said: "Friends will make unintentional mistakes. When they are hurt by friends, write in places that are easy to forget and let the wind erase them. The total of life When there are troughs, when we are helped by friends, we should bear them in mind and never erase them. " As the writer Haruki Murakami said: "you have to remember the people who hold umbrellas for you in the heavy rain, those who protect you from foreign things, those who hold you silently in the dark, those who make you laugh, those who chat with you all night, those who come by car to see you, who say they miss you. It is these people who make up 1.1 drops of warmth in your life, and it is these warmth that keep you away from the haze. " Meet in life, gather because of fate, warm because of love, and break up because you don't hesitate to do so. What is a true friend like? Must know: When you have it, you will be grateful and cherish each other and compare your heart to heart; both sides will be tolerant and understanding and exchange your heart with your heart; like running water, you will come and go, clear and transparent, warm and moist in the years. The more you go back, the more you will realize: Most of the fate in the world is rare, and many of the people you meet don't end up.If there is clean dust and turbid water, there will be no time after that. At the same time, I also understand: In life, the important thing is not to have a lot of friends, but time to leave a few real friends. They may not be the first to meet or the longest acquaintance, but the one who has come and never left. They may not always be around, do not have frequent and eager contact, but they are always with you, giving you warmth and strength. Life turns around a thousand times, and things turn around. The most touching thing in life is that many years later, when you look back, there are still people waiting for you. Friends who have accompanied us for a long way, thank God. Friends who are willing to accompany us for life, thank them. One book a week is released by authorization.
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