Contrary to one's wishes, it is the norm of life.
Bi read good books
Luo Xiang once said:
"do what you think is right, and then accept that it is counterproductive."
Yes, nine times out of ten there are unpleasant things in life.
it would be wise to live in peace with things that go against one's wishes.
contrary to one's wishes, it is the norm of life
in the movie out of reach, Philip is a rich man with a successful career. But he never thought that the rest of his life would be ruined by skydiving, his favorite extreme sport.
this accident made his beloved wife go away forever. And myself, because of serious injuries, will be permanently paralyzed in bed.
A successful person standing at the top of the pyramid became a disabled person who could not even take care of himself because of an accident.
in the movie Gray's Anatomy, there was such a patient:
she has adhered to a healthy diet for decades and loves doing yoga. For the sake of health, she is extremely self-disciplined and gives up a lot of fun in life.
got the report, the patient was completely devastated.
what really hit her was not the cancer itself, but the persistence and efforts made over the years not to get sick.
you see, life is like this. No matter what age and status you are, no matter how much money or power you have, no matter how hard you make and how long you persist, you may fall into the curse that goes against your wishes.
maybe we have to admit that my life is up to me, but sometimes it is also up to heaven.
it may be possible to change one's life against heaven, but it is normal in life to go against one's wishes.
things go against one's wishes and get what they want, only in one thought
it is said that there was a Shu monk in the Tang Dynasty who used to make a living by fishing.
once, he went fishing at sea and worked hard for several days, but got nothing.
if it were someone else, there would be a lot of complaints. But the Shu monk realized the Zen machine while fishing, so he wrote this everlasting Zen poem:
A thousand feet of silk fiber droops straight down, only one wave moves with it.
the cold fish do not eat in the still water at night, and the moon returns when the boat is empty.
Yes, there is no fish in the boat, but the moonlight is all over the cabin. Isn't this another way to return with a full load?
it turns out that as long as you change your way of thinking, things will go against your wishes and get what you want, but only in one thought.
in fact, in life, we always feel that things go against our wishes, but only because of our inner obsession.
if you cling to it, you will be confused, but if you are confused, you will not realize it, so you will be "unrepentant".
if you can let go of your obsession, you may be able to get rid of the curse that goes against your wishes and live at ease.
take parenting as an example. In this age of introspection, we always want our children to get ahead.
but in fact, most children, no matter how much their parents expect, they can only live as ordinary people.
parents feel that after all their painstaking efforts, their children are still not good enough, which is really contrary to their wishes.
you can think about it from another point of view, isn't an ordinary life worth it?
once read a child's composition "me hidden in the corner". He wrote touching words in childish handwriting:
my dream is to be a carpenter. Maybe I don't need to be admitted to Harvard and Peking University, just be happy.
not everyone can't be in the corner, because everyone can be as fragrant as the flowers in the corner. And I am the one hiding in the corner. "
what warm words!
if we can let go of our obsession with success and appreciate that ordinary but happy child, then things will go against our wishes and will get what we want.
Life is long, never mind that things go against one's wishes
the ancients said: what is lost is what is gained.
most of the time, those things go against one's wishes and may pave the way for something in the future.
just like Liu Yong, he never met his talent all his life and did not get what he wanted in the imperial examination. Because of this, he focuses on ci works. He has numerous masterpieces in his life and is famous all over the world. He claims that "where there is well water, he can sing Liu ci."
it is also like Su Shi, a young Jinshi who is proud of himself. But because of a Wutai poetry case, he has been demoted again and again, from Kyoto to Hainan, from hot to cold.
however, Su Shi does not feel sorry for himself. He always believes that all experiences have a reason.
so, when he was demoted to Huangzhou, he indulged in the landscape and wrote the famous poem Chibi Fu.
was demoted to Hainan, he regarded the relegation trip as a missionary way, so that this isolated and barren land would no longer be desolate.
I often think that if Liu Yong had been admitted to the imperial examination as he wished, and if Su Shi had not been demoted to the place, but had been peacefully employed as an official in the capital, how many touching masterpieces would have been missing in Chinese history, and their names would also be forgotten by time?
it can be seen that our lives are very long, and it is not terrible that things go against our wishes for a while, and those who have lost will eventually come back in another form.
what has been missed may be reunited not far ahead.
so please take a longer-term view and don't give up easily.
things change from time to time. Don't be depressed because of the present unhappiness. Please believe that God has other plans.
doing your best and listening to your destiny is the right way to open your life
"In the Seven habits of highly effective people, two words are mentioned, namely, "circle of influence" and "circle of concern".
the circle of influence is the circle that we can change, such as people's knowledge, literacy, ability, experience and so on.
the attention circle refers to the things we focus on, which includes a lot of things that we spend a lot of time and energy that can't be changed, such as weather, house prices, environment and so on.
if we often keep our eyes on the circle of attention, it's easy to get caught up in anxiety that backfires. Because there are a lot of things in the attention circle that we can't change through our efforts.
on the contrary, if we can start from the "circle of influence", pay more attention to what can be done right now, and try our best to do well, we will treat things that cannot be changed with a normal mind.
then over time, our circle of influence will become larger and bigger, our control over life will become stronger and stronger, and the chances of things going against our wishes will be reduced.
it can be seen that doing your best and listening to your destiny is precisely the right way to open your life.
because the former is controllable, we can open up our firepower and work out the best result.
the latter is beyond our control, so keep calm and leave everything to God.
if we maintain this state of mind, our lives are more likely to be happy.
because you have done your best, it is possible to change your fate; because you have no expectation of destiny, you are more able to accept that things are contrary to your wishes.
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the highest way in life is to accept that things go against one's wishes
as the ancients said, "fate comes to cherish, fate goes at will."
Yes, in life, a lot of feelings can not be retained, a lot of things can not be forced.
if we can't let go of our inner obsession and can't accept the normality that things go against our wishes, our lives are bound to be very anxious and hard.
therefore, we need to understand:
the height of life is not how much you see clearly, but how many things you despise. As soon as you put it down, you can feel at ease. From then on, reconcile with things contrary to one's wishes, reconcile with oneself.
in this way, we can not be arrogant and impatient and wait for the flowers to bloom. Live freely, live magnanimously.
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