Never rely on anyone.

have seen such a line:

"if a person can be independent of anyone, then he is really grown up."

when we were young, we were used to relying on others, both emotionally and materially.

getting older, only after experiencing setbacks do we realize that no one can make us rely on it for the rest of our lives.

the greatest maturity of a person is to learn not to rely on anyone.

netizens of Zhihu

@ Summer

shared a story.

Summer is the only child in the family, and she has been used to her parents' sweeping efforts since she was a child.

it was her parents who helped her choose which school to attend in primary and secondary schools.

when she was in college, her parents helped her make decisions about what major to study, which city to go to, and what job she would pursue after graduation.

since childhood, she has been very dependent on her parents, and all her decisions in adulthood have to be discussed with her parents.

at the age of 25, there was a sudden change in her family.

her father was diagnosed with cancer and died regretfully after three months of treatment.

after my father died, my mother was so sad that she was suddenly depressed.

from then on, summer felt as if it had lost its spiritual support, and there were many things that no one could discuss.

her mother asked her to find a boyfriend so that she could be relied on in the future, but she was not good at socializing with others and had no idea of finding a boyfriend.

in summer, I wrote a paragraph in Zhihu, which made people feel and sighed when they read it.

she said:

"when my mother is gone and takes care of her affairs, I will go with her.

at that time, I will be left alone in the world, wronged and without a mother to hug

Touch your head, there is no father shouting who bullied my baby girl. Dad supports you.

I think the world is so big that it has nothing to do with me. "

Psychology professor Hong Lan once said: "Children are too dependent on their parents and may not be independent when they grow up."

A person who is not independent enough has no way to face the ups and downs of life.

when someone you rely on leaves one day, it will be a disaster for you.

likes a sentence that MiyazakiHayao said very much:

"Don't rely on a person easily, it will become your habit.

when parting comes, what you lose is not someone, but the pillar of your spirit.

learn to walk on your own no matter when and where. It will make you walk more calmly. "

Don't try to rely on anyone. When that person leaves, it may be too heavy for you to bear.

like the above story, always rely on others, resulting in only despair and disappointment.

the highest level of self-discipline for adults is to reduce their dependence on others.

I have seen a very interesting metaphor.

A lady complained, "I'm in a bad mood because my husband is not considerate."

she gave her husband the key to happiness.

A mother-in-law complained, "my wife is not filial. I have a hard life."

she put the key to happiness in her wife's hand.

an employee complained: "the boss doesn't appreciate me, that's why I'm depressed."

he gave the key to happiness to the boss.

the reason why they feel unhappy is that they are too dependent on others and pin their happiness on others.

when a person gives the key to happiness to someone else, he naturally opens the lock of his own pain.

in life, if you want to be happy, you must learn not to rely on anyone.

depending on parents, parents will grow old and leave sooner or later; depending on siblings, they also have their own lives.

depending on friends, friends have their own difficulties; depending on partners, partners may also change their minds.

No one in this world can accompany you forever.

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@ small

told a period of his own experience in invisibility.

when he was in college, his family's financial conditions were particularly difficult, because he could not afford the tuition, so he was facing dropping out of school.

one day, while reading Liu Yong's "create yourself", he read a sentence:

"the most basic manifestation of a mature person is that he cares about his own future and creates his own future. He no longer expects his parents to solve everything, but has the ability to be independent."

so he began to take a part-time job in his spare time, handing out leaflets, tutoring and work-study programs.

he is willing to do any dirty work as long as he can earn money to support himself and pay tuition fees.

after graduation, I found a good job. Because of my hard-working character, I was highly regarded by the leaders.

slowly, living conditions have been greatly improved, and now they have come out of the countryside and taken root in the cities.

Goldsmith said: "wherever you are, you have to create and find your own happiness."

all the safety of lifeThe whole feeling has always been given to yourself.

only those who rely on themselves can live hard and live a better life.

when the writer Bi Shumin's sister was about to lose her job, she came to her and said that she wanted to change her career to write articles, hoping to use her sister's talents and resources to make her writing path more smoothly.

however, Bi Shumin's approach completely exceeded her sister's expectation.

when her sister gave the first article to Bi Shumin, Bi Shumin did not comment, but asked her to continue to write.

it took my sister a year to write 10 articles and give them to Bi Shumin.

after reading the article, Bi Shumin said that there were several good articles, and then returned the article to her sister.

with a sigh of relief, my sister handed the article to Bi Shumin, saying, "I've written the article, and then I'll leave it to you to revise the draft."

Bi Shumin refused and let her sister change it herself. The younger sister felt that her sister was a little ruthless, but she could not beat her sister, so she had no choice but to change it herself.

later, my sister realized Bi Shumin's good intentions.

Lu Yao said, "if you live on your own, the soul is at peace."

you should always remember that no one is your harbor forever, and only you can save you.

▽

Destiny is like a long river. You must learn to cross by yourself from one bank to the other.

Don't expect anyone to be your ferry man.

, share with your friends.

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