Birds choose good trees to live, and people choose good friends to make friends.
on Zhihu, I see a question: I have narrow-minded friends around me, what should I do? A highly praised answer said: only stay away. Getting along with narrow-minded people is not only uncomfortable, but also contagious. We can't change others, so when we meet, we have to stay away from them. Narrow-minded people all have these three obvious characteristics to see if there are such people around you. Hold a grudge but not be grateful Narrow-minded people have a typical characteristic: hold grudges and do not remember kindness. As the old saying goes, "Gentlemen do not hold grudges, but villains do not remember grudges." You are kind to him a hundred times, but once, if you fail to get what he wants, what he remembers is your bad. Narrow-minded people, to others pay, will choose to turn a blind eye; to other people's harm, but remember unforgettable. In the Great House Gate, there is a passage like this: During the famine, Bai Jingqi took in Zheng Laofan's family, although the big family was very able to eat, Bai Jingqi did not care. He also arranged for Zheng Laofa to work in the big house, even though there was no shortage of people in charge of the big house. Many years later, Zheng Laofan, who was dying, wanted to find a job for his grandson Zheng Sandan. Bai Jingqi saw that Zheng Laofart didn't eat anything for a few days, so he gave him a big cake to eat. Who knew Zheng Laofart was out of line and ate to death at last. From then on, his grandson Zheng Sandan insisted that Bai Jingqi killed his grandfather. Bai Jingqi sent him to the Baicao Hall to learn his skills, but Zheng Sandan was not grateful. The nicer the Bai family is to him, the more he thinks that the Bai family owes him. Every time Bai Jingqi heard Zheng Sandan say these words, he felt very uncomfortable. Not only that, Zheng Sandan also repeatedly slandered Bai Jingqi for abusing workers. When Bai Jingqi confronted Zheng Sandan, Bai Jingqi was also very sad and doubted whether he had helped the wrong person. It is written in Caigen Tan: "Don't blame others for being small, don't be private, and don't think about old evils. The three can not only cultivate virtue, but also harm far away. " Narrow-minded people only have room for themselves in their hearts and have only their own interests in their eyes. Whenever anyone harms his interests, he will bear it in mind and take advantage of the opportunity to retaliate. For example, take advantage of what you owe him to ask you for something; say those old things, make you feel guilty and embarrassed. So, once we meet such a person, we must stay away. Being with them will only bring disaster to yourself. Be unkind to others. Narrow-minded people have an obvious characteristic: they are unkind to others. As the old saying goes, "the ability of jealousy is the loss of lucky people." Some people are jealous and will secretly do bad things when they are not good at others. When others win the prize, he will be jealous and ridicule strangely. When others are better off than he is, they will spread rumors behind their backs. Narrow-minded people, small-minded, can not tolerate people who are better than themselves. Sun Bin and Pang Juan went out the same door and had a good relationship, but Pang Juan had a good reputation, abandoned his studies and went down the mountain to become an official. When she left, Pang Juan promised Sun Bin that she would take him as an official when she became famous. After going down the mountain, Pang Juan won several battles and was appreciated by King Wei Hui, who was very proud of officialdom. But he was very jealous when he heard many people praise Sun Bin's talent. If Sun Bin goes to other countries, it will be a threat to him, but letting him stay with him will overshadow his own light. As a result, he lied to Sun Bin that he recommended him as an official and let him down the mountain. Sun Bin trusted him very much and went down the mountain immediately after hearing this. As soon as he came down the mountain, Pang Juan cut off his legs, suffered a lot of humiliation, and was abandoned in prison. French writer GeorgeSand said: "the characteristic of the jealous is to hate others because they are happy." A narrow-minded person has no room for others to be better than him, and he will be unbalanced when he sees that others are doing well. In life, there are many such people who use knives to split watermelons when they see that other people's watermelons grow well; when they see that other people's children are excellent, they spread rumors that others are out doing illegal things. They are not having a good time. They wish everyone in the world had a bad life. An open gun can hide, but an arrow in the back is hard to defend. For such a narrow-minded person, you must stay away. You never know when an unintentional act will make them jealous of you. One in person, one on the back. Narrow-minded people have a deeply hidden feature: face-to-face and back-side. They are very resourceful and have a lot of means to deal with others, and they are also very "double-marked", setting a standard for others and a standard for themselves. As the saying goes, "A great quantity is a great blessing, and a deep machine is a deep disaster." Narrow-minded people, good at calculating others, often get caught up in all kinds of disputes. In a variety show, the works of several directors are displayed one by one. When it came to Guo Jingming's works, er Dongsheng commented on his works very politely. Everyone present knew that his comments had been treated with mercy. As a result, when er Dongsheng's works were displayed, Guo Jingming made a random comment. From the work to the actors, he said bluntly that he didn't like the work. Anyone with a discerning eye can see that it is not easy to export such works in such a short time. After listening to this, er Dongsheng directly pointed out that Guo Jingming specially asked all the directors for mercy before the program, and he also showed mercy, but did he show mercy by doing so? Such a double-dealing approach made er Dongsheng very angry, angrily left the stage, stopped the recording of the program. After er Dongsheng left, Guo Jingming grievously shed tears for sympathy. Many viewers sigh that there is a real double standard, one in front of people and one in the back. Do not allow others to talk about themselves, but wantonly trample on others. The harm caused by inserting a knife in the back with a smile in the face is more serious than the direct injury. Lu Kun said: "selfishness is an obstacle to the establishment of people." Narrow-minded people, for their own interests, one after another use tricks, emerge one after another, people can not be prevented. Such a person, very resourceful, if you do not stay away, a little careless, you will be trapped by him. ▽ People often say, be generous. But there are often some narrow-minded people around us, even if some trivial things, will also cling to it. If you let him win, he will despise you; if you let him lose, he will do all sorts of tricks. Birds choose good trees to live, and people choose good friends to make friends. A narrow-minded person for the sake of profitOh, he will fall out at any time. Therefore, if you meet such a person, you should fall out first, don't treat him as a friend, and don't give him a chance to hurt you. As the old saying goes, "the world is wide in the chest, and there are often ferries." When you are with a broad-minded person, you will have less calculation and more freedom.
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